I, Marie Teemant, of warmer places than here, being of sound mind (and frozen assets), do hereby make, publish, and declare the following to be my Last Will and Testament.
I. All books previously placed upon the white bookshelf shall be distributed between BMMS classroom 728 and whichever charitable organizations seen fit by the reading teacher in that room (aka Mom). Please return all library books and take care of fines.
II. Italian leather gloves are to be buried with me somewhere warm. Like Bermuda. Or Hawaii. Sam McGee it if you have to, just keep my poor corpse warm!
III. All other possessions are to be sold and the proceeds are to be used towards the living and pampering of one Sassy S. Kitty, that she may be ensured a good and fat existence.
Should I survive the winter, this contract will be considered null and void until the subsequent snow fall.